Redemptive Story Fall Series Kick-Off

Oct 3

This fall, Diana kicks off our fall episodes with her personal Redemptive Story. Recently shared with one of her small groups, Diana shares the reckless, broken, miserable journey she was once on, and how God, through unfailing Love and Mercy, met her right where she was at; screaming in her pillow! Have ya been there? LOL. Please tune in as we chat about a father’s love and the love of our Father.

Diana’s Notes

Welcome everyone and thank you for tuning into Heartfelt Conversations with Diana!
In this episode, I will be sharing a shortened version of My Story. Recently, in a small group I was in, we all shared our testimonies of our lives prior to having a surrendered life in Christ and after. Mine was a bit harder to narrow down to a few paragraphs. After all, I had over 40 years of a dysfunctional, broken life. I did not have the same story as most of the people I was sitting in this class with, and I admit, I was a bit intimidated because my past was so… well, so much darker, messier, and shame-filled than theirs. But, as my Savior so lovingly reminds me, my past no longer defines who I am, because I have been completely made right and justified forever! Thank you, Jesus!!!

"Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins."
— Romans 3:24 (NLT)

My life, at best, was a soap opera, or more like a Lifetime for Women series, a lot like the movie Sleeping with the Enemy... But as I read more of God’s Word in both the Old and New Testaments, I realized that there were a number of people God worked through, whom Jesus touched, who were just as dysfunctional and broken as me; which, ironically, gave me hope. If God could use those people, if Jesus could heal me the way He did those He healed along His journey while on earth, then I knew He could do the same for me.

I’m going to read the account of a familiar story in the Bible—the story of the Prodigal Son—but I am going to begin at the very beginning of the chapter because we need to know and understand how valuable and treasured each and every single one of us is to God, who longs to be known personally as “Father.”

Luke 15
1 By this time a lot of men and women of doubtful reputation were hanging around Jesus, listening intently.
2 The Pharisees and religion scholars were not pleased, not at all pleased. They growled, "He takes in sinners and eats meals with them, treating them like old friends."
3 Their grumbling triggered this story.
4 "Suppose one of you had a hundred sheep and lost one. Wouldn't you leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness and go after the lost one until you found it?
5 When found, you can be sure you would put it across your shoulders, rejoicing,
6 and when you got home, call in your friends and neighbors, saying, 'Celebrate with me! I've found my lost sheep!'
7 Count on it—there's more joy in heaven over one sinner's rescued life than over ninety-nine good people in no need of rescue.
8 "Or imagine a woman who has ten coins and loses one. Won't she light a lamp and scour the house, looking in every nook and cranny until she finds it?
9 And when she finds it you can be sure she'll call her friends and neighbors: 'Celebrate with me! I found my lost coin!'
10 Count on it—that's the kind of party God's angels throw every time one lost soul turns to God."
11 Then he said, "There was once a man who had two sons.
12 The younger said to his father, 'Father, I want right now what's coming to me.'
13 It wasn't long before the younger son packed his bags and left for a distant country. There, undisciplined and dissipated, he wasted everything he had.
14 After he had gone through all his money, there was a bad famine all through that country, and he began to hurt.
15 He signed on with a citizen there who assigned him to his fields to slop the pigs.
16 He was so hungry he would have eaten the corncobs in the pig slop, but no one would give him any.
17 "That brought him to his senses. He said, 'All those farmhands working for my father sit down to three meals a day, and here I am starving to death.
18 I'm going back to my father. I'll say to him, Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you;
19 I don't deserve to be called your son. Take me on as a hired hand.'
20 He got right up and went home to his father. When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him.
21 The son started his speech: 'Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son ever again.'
22 "But the father wasn't listening. He was calling to the servants, 'Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.
23 Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We're going to feast! We're going to have a wonderful time!
24 My son is here—given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!' And they began to have a wonderful time.
25 "All this time his older son was out in the field. When the day's work was done, he came in. As he approached the house, he heard the music and dancing.
26 Calling over one of the houseboys, he asked what was going on.
27 He told him, 'Your brother came home. Your father has ordered a feast—barbecued beef!—because he has him home safe and sound.'
28 "The older brother stalked off in an angry sulk and refused to join in. His father came out and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't listen.
29 The son said, 'Look how many years I've stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief, but have you ever thrown a party for me and my friends?
30 Then this son of yours, who has thrown away your money on whores, shows up and you go all out with a feast!'
31 "His father said, 'Son, you don't understand. You're with me all the time, and everything that is mine is yours—
32 but this is a wonderful time, and we had to celebrate. This brother of yours was dead, and he's alive! He was lost, and he's found!'"

This is known as the story of the Prodigal, or Prodigal Son. Prodigal implies reckless or wasteful lavishness, threatening to lead to early exhaustion of resources.

On Christianwebsite.com:
The term “prodigal” in the Bible refers to someone who is wastefully extravagant and spends resources recklessly. It comes from the parable of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15, where the younger son asks for his inheritance early and squanders it away in a distant land. His loose living leads him to poverty, hunger, and envy over the food even pigs are eating. Truly, his selfish choices led to a miserable outcome.

Quote:
"No matter how badly people have failed, God is eager to run to meet them, embrace them, and restore relationships with them when they repent. The parable powerfully conveys God’s redemptive love for the lost."

As Jesus says:
"There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance."
— Luke 15:7

The parable highlights heaven’s joy over a sinner coming back into a relationship with God. This is why discipleship is so important. Jesus knew that without retraining our minds and thoughts off the dead way we are used to and learning to lean on God and trust His ways—His way being the only way—we would be lost. God designed every aspect of the universe: creation, human beings, gravity—all of it. He is the designer and creator, and we need to trust and believe that He knows the very best path to get us to our eternal destination—not just with as little “damage” and wear and tear as possible, but because God wants His children to have a rich, blessed, fulfilling, and whole life. A life overflowing with joy, love, hope, peace, kindness, and thoughtfulness.

But, many of us, like the Prodigal Son, are stubborn, full of pride, and self-centered. Our energy and focus are on ourselves. It’s a natural human state. Think about a toddler who is learning every day and beginning to learn independence, and before long, they are telling mommy and daddy, “I can do it myself.” “Me, I do it!” NO! All of a sudden, this sweet little toddler is resisting their parents' desire to protect and keep them safe. It is a natural part of life, but as we are learning independence and freedom of choice, we also learn (and some of us take a loooonnggg time to learn! Haha—ME!) that with choice, freedom, and independence, come consequences, hardships, and destruction if we don’t also learn to be a little humble and wait for the “right” time. If we have not already learned this lesson—that there are right times and seasons that will open the right doors at the right time for us—then we may end up like the Prodigal Son, not wanting to wait. We say, “I want what I want, and I want it now!” And we make it happen. We don’t wait for the doors to unlock and open; we push through, break down the doors, and storm in, thinking we have the right! “It’s my right! We demand!! And maybe it is, but is the time right? Are we mature enough to handle what we think we want or deserve?

I lived a hard, harsh prodigal life - meaning it was reckless and I nearly lost everything. My push for freedom as a young teen was out of wrong thinking. I was immature in the way I saw things because I was still developing - but I thought I knew better! So, off I went. But my broken road started out because I had the wrong thinking that I didn’t belong. So, I wanted to go where I felt I belonged.

And out on the road of a distant place I searched. I searched for love, acceptance, and belonging. I never felt like I belonged in my family, and at the time; I thought it was just me. That she didn’t like “me”!

I learned later in my life that my mom struggled with her own upbringing. I’m not sure if I ever really bonded with my mom as an infant up to 5 years of age. The best I remember is being very attached and bonding with my oldest sister, who cared for me.

After we moved out to the country and my sister stayed behind, I tried to get my mom to like me by being helpful - trying to clean the house, by trying to keep quiet and not bug her or irritate her.

My brothers and sisters were quite a bit older than me, so I didn’t grow up with them as I would have if we would have been closer in age, so I didn’t know that each one had their own struggles. I thought it was just me, and that perspective added more weight of rejection onto my mindset.

I was sexually abused by my uncle and cousin from about 8 years of age until about the 6th or 7th grade.

Because I was so timid of my mom and believed my mom was displeased with me, I was too afraid and too ashamed to say anything.

The church I grew up in was as hard and harsh as mom. The small southern baptist church was dead! Well, now, I know it was a dead church. But back then as a kid, I thought I was just bad, wicked, evil. I certainly didn’t feel loved there either. And there was no message on God’s love, mercy, grace. It was all fire and brimstone. Be saved or go to hell!!!! And not only be saved. Live with ZERO faults! Who can do that!!!! If even a few churches are like the one I grew up in, no wonder people feel separated from God and have the wrong view of Who He is AND His absolute, unfailing love for each and every single one of us. !

But I received Jesus as my Savior and was baptized at a Gospel Barn pond when I was 12 years old. I thought when I got baptized and came up out of the water that all the bad things I felt about myself would be instantly removed. But, I felt exactly the same. I thought that it was a sign from God that there was a defect in me that made me unacceptable. To Him, to my mom, to the world.

For a long time, I tried everything I knew to get my mom to like me. I behaved, I was quiet, I never sassed, I tried to help clean the house and do laundry, but nothing I did was ever done right or good enough.

Then when I was 15 my mom told me she was putting me on birth control because she just knew I would end up pregnant and she wasn’t going to go through that. At that moment, it was like any good left in me, the life in me, just leaked out and left me flat, empty - and I became so angry at my mom. I went from wanting to please her and find a way to get her to love me, to where I felt like I hated her. I felt so rejected by her and it was like she only saw bad in me, no good - so now she was going to get to see just how bad I could be. I went from one extreme to the other. I dropped out of all the good things I was involved in, and I began to party and went from wanting to be good to wanting a bad guy to help me show my mom if she wanted to think I was just a bad girl who gets pregnant than that is what she was going to get. So at 15 I became pregnant with my oldest son. I was wrong in my actions! No question about that! But, as a child still. Yes I was 15 but what do we know at 15? You think you know a lot, until 20, 30, years down the road, and you are living with the consequences of your actions.

At 16, I became involved with a very evil man. I do not know anything about his life now, and I hope and pray he has repented and come to know the LORD for himself, but during this time, he was filled with violence. He was brutally mean and dangerous. For the next 4 years of my life I lived terrified. I never knew if I would be alive from one day to the next. I was beaten, raped, tortured and often times left unconscious. There were times he would strip off all my clothes and drive me out into the middle of the country and tell me to walk back home. He said he needed to teach me to be obedient to him. During this time, I became pregnant with my second child, my daughter. That made him really furious. In fact, he was so angry that I was pregnant, that he literally would try to physically beat her out of me throughout the pregnancy. Because of the abuse and stress. She did end up being born premature.

My life, the lives of my children, became a matter of survival. At 20, I finally broke away, but it was dangerous for me and the kids, and even my parents.

I was in the middle of a custody battle when he tried to kill me by putting a gun to my head. The temple of my head and he pulled the trigger 3 times! But nothing happened!!

My kids were playing in a bedroom at the time and as he was holding me down with the gun pressed against my temple, I saw my son step out into the hallway and was holding the hand of his little sister as she stepped out of the room with him. As I laid there, the only thing that I thought was…

“Please God, not in front of my kids…”

He pulled the trigger three distinct times. Then suddenly, he fell backwards like he saw a ghost. I never saw him with a look of fear in his eyes, until that day. He looked completely bewildered.

Somehow, with God’s supernatural intervention and help, I managed to talk him into letting me and the kids go. At the time, I didn’t know that God was helping me, but now I know without a doubt that the Holy Spirit kept me calm that day and in a very calm and soothing voice I was able to keep him calm and from reacting to a very delicate situation. It could have turned out very differently that day, but I am convinced that because I gave my heart to Jesus and even though I was not living as I should, I was still God’s child and He was very interested in being involved with my life. I was His child and He was protecting me while I was in the fire.

In the old testament there is a story about 3 young men, along with Daniel who refused to bow down and worship the king rather than God. And so they were thrown into a fiery furnace to die.

One day we will chat more about these guys!

But even when evil comes, even when we are already in the fire, God can still rescue us. He is the God of all things. There is no circumstance God can not alter or change for the good,He can create a new way, a new path, but it requires us to do our part, which is to trust and obey Him. Learn to know His voice above all others. So that when all the noise of this world starts screaming in your head, His voice rises above it all and then you are able to follow Him into safety.

Just like the father of the prodigal son, just because the boy took his inheritance and took off from under his father’s protection, did not mean the father did not look and long for his son to return home to safety and provision. But our Father creates all resources, He is never without power, authority and ability to always watch over us. This father loved his son, even when his son rebelled against him and disgraced him, his love for his child was higher and deeper than anything of this world. And if this person could love so deeply how much more does our Heavenly Father love us?

Ephesians 3:18-19

And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

There has just been so much danger and evil and loss and chaos and destruction in my life it is hard to know what to share - there is just so much- like the son, so much misery because of my own choices - anyways…

So, not only were we going through a custody battle for my daughter but now we ere heading to court for his attempt to take my life. We had just finished the pre-trial and headed to trial when I was in a car accident that took the life of my daughter. My mom and my pastor told me it was because of my sin that she was dead. That God took her out of punishment to me.

I just shut down. I could not understand how a God who I believed in, could kill an innocent child to teach me a lesson. And I shut down. I never stopped believing in God, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to trust a God who would kill a child.

So because I questioned God’s goodness, for decades my life was a roller-coaster ride. Filled with chaos, destruction, disorder, a shamble, a mess. I had made a mess of everything!

Then in 2016 I had a knock down drag out fight with God. I had just been through a betrayal that shook me to the core. A heartbreak I had not felt in a very long time and it was the straw that broke me. I finally told God everything that I had pressed down since childhood and screamed and yelled at God for destroying my life and rejecting me. I even told Him I hated Him for hurting me so badly by taking my daughter. Obviously, this was a one-sided fight. God never insulted me, never turned away from me. As I screamed into my pillow to keep the sound down, I broke, and before the rage could shatter my heart into unrepairable pieces, God gently reached in and held me right where I was at. In the middle of my breakdown, He held me tightly and I felt His presence as if He were in the room, and His arms stretched out, holding me, comforting me, telling me so softly and tenderly “ I Know, I know everything” It’s okay”

From that day until now, I have made a determined purpose to seek Him. To seek His love and seek after Who He says He is.

We can receive Jesus as our Savior, that is the first step to Salvation, but it is only the beginning to a brand new life. A new way of thinking and being. That is what Jesus was teaching His disciples. God is not against us. He is for us. He is not a God who desires hardships and horrors for His people, but we bring those things into our lives when we shut Him out. When we don’t follow His path for us. And sometimes, even when we do obey God, trust Him completely, bad things can still happen. I think that is why I was in so much shock. I was really trusting God and people were mocking my faith, and then my daughter died and I felt betrayed. I believed so everything should have been okay. But it wasn’t. * NOTE: (This was not on the aired portion and I am just thinking of this now and may speak of it a bit in the next or future episodes)

BUT! Not because God is cruel or mean or teaches us by beatings and brutality, but because we do live in a broken world. Ever since Satan tricked Adam and Eve into disobeying God, we have been in a world separated from God’s best. Jesus came to restore us back to God’s best because God loves us so much!

If my life can change. If my mindset about God and His view of me can change. If I can have a broken dysfunctional life void of joy and love and contentment. If God can restore me and redeem me back to life. He can and will do it for you too- If you choose to trust Him and obey the things that he tells you to do.

I live now to tell of His Glory because He has rescued me from a living death.

Psalm 118:7

I shall not die, but live, and shall declare the works and recount the illustrious acts of the LORD.

And my past provides a lot of material to fulfill that! LOL!!!!!

That verse is actually what led me here, to this podcast and to my position on staff at VFC.

And I pray and hope and believe that God will use this very simple, podcast as a way to reach whoever will listen and decide that like me, they too desire more than the frustrating, messy, stress filled, empty life that may be yours into a fulfilling, satisfying, whole good pleasing life God has for you right now. It can begin today if that is a desire in your heart.

Let God in. Let Him begin to do a good work in you like He has in my own life and free yourself from all guilt and shame and fear and stress you have allowed to seep into your life.

Tell God how you feel. Tell Him you need Him to show up in your life. But then, you need to let Him.

Just like the father who welcomed home his son who took off and lived a life that brought dishonor to his father’s household, the prodigal son wanted to come home as a servant, unworthy to be called his father’s son, but the father said no way!!! This is my boy!! I have been watching, looking, waiting for the day he would come to his senses and return back home. No! He will not be chained to shame, he has come home so let’s celebrate! God wants to celebrate you!

The bible tells us this when one person turns back to God:

Verse:

Luke 15:7 in the New Living Translation reads…

In the same way, there is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven’t strayed away.

Our Father’s Love, Mercy, Grace, and Forgiveness Are Unconditional

Even when we intentionally turn away from God, and despite our faults and failures when it comes to forgiving others and even being able to forgive ourselves; the Father’s endless love is always perfect. He WILL NOT FAIL YOU! We never have to fear how God will receive us, if we cry out to Him and tell Him all our sins and seek His face with a genuine heart, He is waiting with wide open arms to welcome us home! Just like the prodigal son’s father was so excited to see his son return home, why he left did not matter. The only thing his father cared about was that he came back! God just wants us to come back to Him if we have lost our way.

Do you feel like you could use a little refreshing in your life?

Acts 3:19-20 tells us…

Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away. Then times of refreshment will come from the presence of the LORD.

I know we wrapped up our Summer Series talking about 5 things to focus on, but let’s continue to make these 5 things a staple in our lives as we pursue, love, joy, and peace - God’s peace, not the peace that this world speaks of- based on a good day or a bad day - NO! God’s Peace, the peace Jesus gives!

So, let’s continue to:

Fix our Eyes On Jesus
Develop Self-Discipline
Trust God. Period. Jesus trusted Himself and everything to His Father - Sought Him in prayer often.
Rest And Relax.
Have Fun. Enjoy Life.

Psalms 16:11 ESV

You make known to me the path of life; in Your Presence there is fullness of joy; at Your Right Hand are pleasures forevermore!

Next week I’m not really sure what direction we will go, but I am confident that the Lord has something in mind! HAHA

So - Keep your Chin Up - Eyes fixed on Jesus!

A spirit-led life that lines our perspective up with what God’s word says, not the world. That is walking by faith. Trusting God.

And remember…

The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing -

Zephaniah 3:17 ESV

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.

Ephesians 3:20-21

God Bless!!

Songs to inspire you

Let the Redeemed - Josh Baldwin | Worship

Gratitude - Brandon Lake | Moment

Desert Road

Scriptures from this week's Podcast

Romans 3:24 NLT

Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He (God) did this through Christ Jesus (His Son) when he freed us from the penalty for our sins.

Luke 15: 1

By this time a lot of men and women of doubtful reputation were hanging around Jesus, listening intently. The Pharisees and religion scholars were not pleased, not at all pleased. They growled, "He takes in sinners and eats meals with them, treating them like old friends." Their grumbling triggered this story. "Suppose one of you had a hundred sheep and lost one. Wouldn't you leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness and go after the lost one until you found it? When found, you can be sure you would put it across your shoulders, rejoicing, and when you got home call in your friends and neighbors, saying, 'Celebrate with me! I've found my lost sheep!' Count on it - there's more joy in heaven over one sinner's rescued life than over ninety-nine good people in no need of rescue. "Or imagine a woman who has ten coins and loses one. Won't she light a lamp and scour the house, looking in every nook and cranny until she finds it? And when she finds it you can be sure she'll call her friends and neighbors: 'Celebrate with me! I found my lost coin!' Count on it - that's the kind of party God's angels throw every time one lost soul turns to God." Then he said, "There was once a man who had two sons. The younger said to his father, 'Father, I want right now what's coming to me.' It wasn't long before the younger son packed his bags and left for a distant country. There, undisciplined and dissipated, he wasted everything he had. After he had gone through all his money, there was a bad famine all through that country and he began to hurt. He signed on with a citizen there who assigned him to his fields to slop the pigs. He was so hungry he would have eaten the corn cobs in the pig slop, but no one would give him any. "That brought him to his senses. He said, 'All those farmhands working for my father sit down to three meals a day, and here I am starving to death. I'm going back to my father. I'll say to him, Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son. Take me on as a hired hand.'

He got right up and went home to his father. When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him. The son started his speech: 'Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son ever again.' "But the father wasn't listening. He was calling to the servants, 'Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We're going to feast! We're going to have a wonderful time! My son is here - given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!' And they began to have a wonderful time.

Ephesians 3:18-19

Luke 15:7

In the same way, there is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven’t strayed away.

Psalm 118:7

I shall not die, but live, and shall declare the works and recount the illustrious acts of the LORD.

Acts 3:19-20

Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away. Then, times of refreshment will come from the presence of the LORD…

Philippians 2:12:

Continue to work out your salvation - [that is, cultivate it, bring it to full effect, actively pursue spiritual maturity] with awe-inspired fear and trembling [using serious caution and critical self-evaluation to avoid anything that might offend God or discredit the name of Christ]

Foundation Verse

Romans 8:11

The Spirit of God, Who raised Jesus from the dead, lives in you. And just as God raised Chrisr Jesus from the dead, He will give life to your mortal bodies by this same Spirit living in you. “

Additional Resources

Prayer of Salvation

Jesus has given salvation, healing, and countless benefits to all who call upon His name. These benefits can be yours if you receive Him into your heart by saying this prayer:

Heavenly Father, I come to You admitting that I am a sinner. Right now, I choose to turn away from sin, and I ask You to cleanse me of all unrighteousness. I believe that Jesus rose again from the dead so that I may be justified and made righteous through faith in Him. I call upon the name of Jesus Christ to be the Savior and Lord of my life. Jesus, I choose to follow You, and I ask that You fill me with the power of the Holy Spirit. I declare right now that I am a born again, child of God. I am free from sin and full of the righteousness of God. I am saved in Jesus’ name. Amen.

This prayer and the comment above, were taken out of the book:

Secrets to Powerful Prayer - Discovering the Languages of the Heart

By Lynne Hammond and Patsy Cameneti

If you have just received Jesus as your Savior, please write Lynne Hammond Ministries at:

PO Box 29469

Minneapolis, Minnesota 55429-2946

Or, email one of the ministries listed on the Additional Resources Tab and let them know that you are a brand new christian and need some direction on the next steps for your new life in Christ.

Or email us here at Heartfelt Conversations with Diana and we will pass along your information for you.

Congratulations if you are a brand new Christian or if you have Returned Home! Welcome!!! Get in God’s Word and get it into you!

Diana’s Home Church:

Valley Family Church - Pastor’s Eric and Alexa Jones
www.valleyfamilychurch.org

Other recommended Jesus-centered churches who teach the True Word of God:

Elevation Church - Steven Furtick
https://elevationchurch.org/

Joseph Prince Ministries - Joseph Prince
https://www.josephprince.org/

Joyce Meyer Ministries
https://joycemeyer.org/

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